The Hidden Wound Beneath Extremism: Avoidant Personality and the Search for Belonging
By Akshat Agrawal | May 2025
In a polarized world brimming with ideological certainty, there lies a silent psychological undercurrent that often goes unnoticed — Avoidant Personality Disorder (AvPD). Typically associated with individuals struggling with social anxiety, feelings of inadequacy, and deep fear of rejection, AvPD rarely features in conversations about political extremism. But perhaps it should.
Across India, North America, and parts of Europe, growing waves of conservative nationalism, identity-based radicalism, and ideological rigidity point toward a deeper crisis — a psychological hunger for belonging, masked by group superiority.
When Ideology Becomes a Coping Mechanism
Let’s consider the Sangh Parivar in India, Khalistani hardliners among the diaspora in Canada, and Zionist extremists in the US. At first glance, these groups seem worlds apart. But look closer, and a common thread emerges: a rigid ideological shell that often forms around unresolved personal and cultural trauma.
In India, young men from emotionally suppressive households or lower-middle-class backgrounds often find refuge in the structured discipline of Hindutva shakhas. Emotion is seen as weakness; empathy is discouraged. But beneath the surface lies deep shame, fear of judgment, and rejection — core traits of AvPD.
In Canada, second-generation Sikh youths grappling with identity confusion and generational disconnect may romanticize a Khalistani past, not necessarily out of separatist conviction, but as a reaction to feeling alienated both at home and in society.
And among some Zionist hardliners in the US, the existential anxiety rooted in historical trauma like the Holocaust and persistent antisemitism becomes displaced into uncompromising geopolitical stances. Personal fears are projected outward onto national narratives.
Understanding the Mind Behind the Mask
Psychologists call this "pre-mentalizing": when people lack the ability to understand their own and others’ emotional states. Instead of reflection, there's projection. Instead of dialogue, there's dogma.
Avoidant Personality Disorder isn’t just about avoiding people — it’s about avoiding emotional pain. And when that pain is collective or historical, it often finds expression in group ideologies that promise certainty, identity, and protection.
But the cost is high. Empathy shrivels. Polarization deepens. And individuals remain trapped, unable to connect authentically with themselves or others.
From Avoidance to Awakening
Healing requires a multi-level approach.
At the personal level, therapies like Mentalization-Based Therapy (MBT) and Compassion Training can help individuals develop self-awareness and emotional resilience. Practices like journaling, mindfulness, and even creative expression through music or nature can gently open up internal space where once there was only rigidity.
At the group level, safe spaces for inter-community dialogue, spiritual mentoring, and culturally rooted but inclusive identities can bridge the divide. In India, a return to dharma-based ethics, in Canada, an embrace of multicultural Punjabi-Canadian pride, and in the US, a Judaism centered on social justice — these can all serve as paths of integration rather than exclusion.
The Real Revolution Is Emotional
We often think of radicalism as a political problem, but it’s also an emotional one. And the real revolution may begin not with protests or power, but with a collective willingness to feel again — to acknowledge pain, fear, and longing without hiding behind flags or slogans.
Avoidant Personality Disorder might be diagnosed clinically in individuals. But its traits — fear of judgment, escape into idealized narratives, hypersensitivity to criticism — are increasingly mirrored in our political culture.
Healing this collective wound calls for more than policy. It calls for emotional courage.
About the Author:
Akshat Agrawal is a sustainability advocate, writer, and engineer based in Abu Dhabi, passionate about mental health, geopolitics, and India’s evolving spiritual ecology. Connect on [LinkedIn/Substack/Facebook].
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